Joining the Quiet Revolution

In June 2006, I left a snow-covered Christchurch, New Zealand and travelled to Marin County, California to attend the annual United States HSP gathering. It was one of the most uplifting and inspiring events in my life. When I returned to New Zealand I was inspired to do something to help HSPs in New Zealand learn about their trait and to come together for support and friendship. 

I created a website and slowly built up a following and hosted a small gathering in Wellington in 2008. However, the time commitment, expense and pressure from my then-partner (he suspected me of being involved in a "cult") eventually led to me giving up the website. Fortunately one of my followers was keen to carry on what I had started and I transferred the site to her.  It has since become the HSP Network (Australia & New Zealand).

Life was pretty good for a while after that, I got a new job that I enjoyed immensely and suited my quiet persona, my partner and I moved into a bigger home together and we adopted two "children" - two Flemish giant rabbits. Everything seemed right. I felt I had finally succeeded in "beating" my quietness and blending in with the rest of the world.

But, you can't really change who you are at your core. Eventually my partner, though introverted himself, started to complain that I didn't talk enough and that he needed his freedom. Things at work changed and I was moved from a team of fellow quiet intellectuals, to a team of loud extroverted comms people. My partner left, I moved to a new house and my rabbits passed away.

I'm again facing the familiar work bias that I "won't be able to do the job because I'm not outgoing enough" and I simply can't face the singles scene again. But, I have the freedom to really be myself now. I love my new home - I spend many wonderful happy silent hours pottering in my garden, creating in my hobbies room and being single Mum to my new rabbit.

Back at the Walker Creek ranch in 2006, I remember talking to a woman called Susan. She was attending the gathering to research a book she was writing on introversion. We had some interesting discussions with others in the group about the battle for acceptance from peers, employers and life partners, we quiet people go through.

Just a few weeks ago, I came across an excellent talk on the power of introverts. It hit me a few moments after the talk ended that this was the same Susan I met in 2006! I immediately went out and bought her book, Quiet, which I highly recommend. And so I feel inspired again.

There is still very little information and understanding in New Zealand about sensitivity and introversion, so I hope that in some way, my blog might spread the word and help quiet New Zealanders find answers, acceptance and pride in themselves. 

I'm joining the Quiet Revolution.