Those of us who are quiet, are conditioned from childhood to believe that we're socially deficient and of little value. If the tables were turned and society favoured the quiet, reserved thinkers of the population, the 'high-octane' people of this world would battle just as much with self-esteem and confidence issues.
Being a quiet person is perfectly normal – it does not mean you’re stupid, shy or have a mental illness. Being quiet means you share certain perfectly natural personality traits along with 20% to 50% of the population. You’re not abnormal, you’re just a different kind of normal – just as red hair is a normal, but less common hair colour.
The sad reality of being a quiet person in a world that praises the outgoing
At school we’re bullied because we keep to ourselves and our teachers, parents and family friends give us damaging labels of ‘withdrawn, too sensitive, shy, lacking confidence, antisocial’.At work we’re accused of not being a team player because we prefer to work alone and avoid office social functions, our opinions are ignored and we’re never considered for promotion because we’re too soft-spoken.
In our relationships we’re seen as too reserved, high-maintenance, having ‘issues’, too serious, not outgoing enough and in the fierce competition of the dating arena, we’re trampled by the party-loving majority.
The key to changing attitudes is understanding
In recent years we have seen the change in attitude and acceptance of people with disabilities, from different ethnicities, different sexual orientations, worker rights and women’s rights. And yet those quiet, reflective members of the population are still discriminated against and bullied without reproach – for no other reason than a lack of understanding. It is time for this to stop!The first step to understanding is education. We need to teach introverts and highly sensitive people that it's okay to be themselves and we need to teach teachers, employers, leaders, everyone about the strengths of the quiet ones and to value them.
What makes a quiet person quiet?
In the majority of cases though, quietness is a result of having an introverted personality type and/or heightened sensitivity. Have a look at the information about the traits of introversion and sensitivity. The aim of this blog is to help guide you on your path of self-acceptance and understanding, and to encourage you to be proud of your own special gifts and strengths.There are some reasons that a person may be quiet and withdrawn – these may stem from past traumatic experiences or genuine phobias. In these cases, professional help can help immensely and should be sought.
